A+ to my work for hiring the new super huge, tattooed, hot and super intimidating-looking bouncer.
A+++++ to my life because he drove me home and is actually the nicest guy.
F- to my hormones for making me want to offer him my body.
I think we should all celebrate by taking a moment to appreciate Robert Pattinson’s attitude and I’m laughing so much right now.
JUST ALL THAT HE IS.
I’m going to miss this
Who would have thought he hated Twilight so much?
He hates Twilight more than Stephen King.
I’m in love hahahahah
god shut up u lil shits
"Some people are old at 18 and some are young at 90. Time is a concept that humans created."
fucking hell my dad was carving the chicken for dinner and all of a sudden i just hear him manically giggling to himself so i fucking go into the kitchen and this is what i fucking find
jesus christ dad what the fuck
with the fake text posts lbr we kno u decapitated a bratz doll for the sad, sad purpose of this post
I’m totally okay with getting my period again…
7 DAYS AFTER IT ALREADY ENDED
er mah gawd
oh my god
this whole fucking episode
- Mom: Fear of holes? But you were a lesbian once....
- Me: Mom...
i did this once and i got stuck and got told off by the employees